This blog post is a repost from my old website, originally posted 20th December 2017.
As a companion who indulges in kink, I often get asked how and when my journey into the BDSM community started.
I'd long since been fascinated with sex by the time I was a teenager, with a voracious appetite for masturbation, a generous amount of experience with boys and the odd fumbling encounter with girls.
Sadly, growing up when I did in the days before home internet (I was seventeen by the time I managed to talk my Mum into setting up a Freeserve account), there was no Google, which somewhat delayed my sexual education. Not to mention the appallingly vague excuse for sex ed we received at school.
I knew what S&M meant, but my knowledge was minimal. My best friends neighbours were into it, which bought giggles and snide comments from my girlfriends. All in all, my early introduction was rather negative.
It wasn't until I was fifteen that I got my first glimpse of a world which appealed to me in a way I didn't understand at the time.
I'd taped a movie on VHS, Empire Records. It's everything and the soundtrack is superb, I highly recommend it.
A few days later I sat down to watch it, leaving the credits rolling to listen to the music when it was over.
I was a sucker for recording on long play, and when I came back into my bedroom from the bathroom another movie was about to start, playing on TV that night after Empire Records.
It was French, so my curiosity was well and truly piqued. That and the fact there was an obscenity warning at the start of the film, if we're being honest.
The movie was The Story of O. If you're not aware of it, or the book it was based on, it centres around a young girl named O, and her initiation into the world of submission and dominance.
Despite O's experiences being, at times, more than a little harrowing, I found myself drawn into the world of sex and power, and immediately wanted to know more.
I found myself fantasising of getaways with older, experienced lovers, lost weekends consumed by passionate sex and power play.
Ever the bookworm, and still without the Internet, I took to reading about kink.
I started with the obvious, Black Lace and Nexus books from the spinning wire rack hidden at the back of my local Waterstone's.
The tattered, well loved paperbacks were my porn, my personal pillow talk before bed.
I recently sought one out on Kindle, on a particularly nostalgic night.
It was as ridiculous as I'd imagined it would be, but I'm rather fond of it despite myself. Much the same as I'm fond of my old pre-teen Point Horror collection I can't seem to part wit
h. Only wetter, you know?
Before long I got dial up at home, and my real education began, albeit slow at first. The Internet is many things, some of them bad. But you can't deny it is an excellent tool for education and sharing real life experiences.